(Think of the tune in your head)...
Real men of genius
Today we salute you, Mr. Inbev executive board member.
Dirty bastard
In the world of beer and investments, you opened a c...
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After a long night of lovemaking, a man sees a picture of another man on the bedside table. He grows nervous, and after a couple of minutes he asks his lover, "Is that your husband?"
...
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You Might Be A Racer If....
- You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
- You take your helmet along when you go to buy new eyeglasses or check out
cars.
- You ...
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IMPORT TERMINOLOGY
All Motor
Definition: No nitrous, no blower, or turbo.
Sentence: That guy wanted to race our Camaro "all motor." We didn't know what that meant so we beat hi...
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Apologies if this is a re-post, made me chuckle though....
Once upon a time, a blonde became so sick of hearing blonde jokes that she had her hair cut and dyed brown. A few days later, as sh...
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Operating Room live
OR-live
https://www.or-live.com/ [http://www.noobsters.com/forum/redirector.php?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.or-live.com%2F]>
...
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A man walks into a bar, late one night completely knackered and dripping with sweat and orders 5 whiskies.
"What's wrong with you?" The barman says.
"In my car I've got a nymphomaniac - you ...
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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and ...
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Did you hear about the Spice Girl who's car broke down? She asked the mechanic what the problem was.
He said 'crap in the carburettor'
'Oh' she said 'how often do I have to do that?'
...
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For those of you who haven't had the pleasure yet, this is really close to reality, all humour aside
This is from newshound Dave Barry's colonoscopy journal:
... I called my friend And...
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An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her
return, her Father cussed her.
'Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not
even a line? Why didn't y...
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A farmer wanted to have his hens serviced, so he went to the market looking for a rooster. He was hoping he could get a special rooster - one that would service all of his many hens.
When he ...
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TOP FATAL THINGS TO SAY TO PREGNANT WIFE
17. "I finished the Oreo's."
16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty pounds."
15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never g...
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I went to see the nurse this morning for my annual check-up. She said I have to stop wanking. When I asked why she said, “Because I’m trying to examine you!”
...
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Gentlemen,
I have been riding trains daily for the last two years, and the service on your line seems to be getting worse every day.
I am tired of standing in the aisle all the time on a ...
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...
Two guys were chatting over a few pints at the local pub.
The subject of ‘death and dying’ came up and some deeply-metaphysical comments were being made.
Then one of the fellows sa...
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Husband: Oh, come on.
Wife: Leave me alone !
Husband: It won't take long.
Wife: I won't be able to sleep afterwards.
Husband: I can't sleep without it.
Wife: Why do you think o...
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One day, in line at the works cafeteria, Dave says to Mike behind him,
'My elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd better see a doctor!'
Listen mate ; don't waste your time down at the surgery,...
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For those who were born before 1979!!
TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED the 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's
First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant...
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A man took his Rottweiler to the vet and said to him, "My dogs cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for it?"
"Well," said the vet "let's have a look at him" The vet picks the dog up by the ...
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Grevaise is hysterical as it is but this had me on the floor.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTeB4KeeaQg [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTeB4KeeaQg]>
...
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One of my hobbies is to put "interesting" facebook statuses, rather than the typical "is watching TV", or "has new socks", or "just booked a holiday!". I ra...
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I never dreamed slowly cruising through a residential neighborhood could be
so incredibly dangerous! Studies have shown that motorcycling requires more
decisions per second, and more sheer dat...
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what did grandmother say when her granddaughter made a cup of tea for her?
she said 'Thank you' ...
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http://www.network54.com/Realm/tmp/1215896970.JPG [http://www.noobsters.com/forum/redirector.php?url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.network54.com%2FRealm%2Ftmp%2F1215896970.JPG]>
...
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